Humble Goodbyes

We had a lovely party in the park today for my daughter’s KiTa teacher. While she’s been at the KiTa much longer than we have, she’s been a cornerstone of our lives for as long as we’ve been here and we’re sad to see her moving on to new adventures. But any reason is a good reason to celebrate, and so we got up this morning, my daughter put on her twirliest party dress, grabbed her gift and card, and off we went.

After KiTa, a few of the teachers hauled tables out into a corner of the park and everyone contributed to a potluck feast set for little hands to help themselves.  The current class of kids presented her with a bouquet of flowers and a small gift and several previous classmates showed up for a visit. 

The adults sat in the sun, sipped bubbly water and ate quiche, and chatted about life and kids in a fluid mix of German and English. In the past few weeks I've been able to hold my own in these conversations that slip between languages. It reminds me of the trilingual conversation I overheard between my host mother and her friends when studying abroad in Spain, my first real insight into the power and tenacity of communication across borders but among friends. 

The kids played on the playground nearby. It’s a fairly small one by Berlin’s standards, but packing seven little girls onto a nest swing four feet in diameter makes even a tiny playlot a rollicking adventure. My daughter, polka dot skirt fluttering behind her, screamed that this time the drop in her stomach was fun instead of scary.  Then of course they’d run up, grab a handful of snacks or a sip of water, and race back to their games. Not one adult played with them, and my daughter put her shoes on coming out of the sand every time without a reminder. 

It was a humble party. Low key, low stress, and lots of fun. There weren’t excessive decorations or any sort of theme. We didn’t sign up for a specific menu item or stress over details. The teachers set the date and everyone kicked in a few Euros so one mom could pick out a gift on our behalf. The crux of the celebration was simply to eat good food and enjoy each other’s company. 

One of the things I adore most about life in Germany is that not every event needs to be over the top.The humble home party is second only to the humble park party where no one has to vacuum and the joyful noises float on the wind instead of reverberating off every hard interior surface. 

I can tell myself that the moms I see on Instagram pulling out all the stops for a themed party or one-upping each other for the best teacher gifts are doing it because they love it, but to a large extent, I call bullshit. Yes, I have done my share of late-night crafting and party-planning Pinterest perusing, but I've always kept a tight budget in mind, and in the end, what I've found matters most is the way people connect to each other. All you need is some good food and a chance to sit and chat or launch the nest swing to space, depending on your age.